


Attack on Cliche Romantic Scenes

by WindMeister8



Category: Death Note (2017), Death Note (Anime & Manga), Death Note (Live Action TV), Death Note (Movies), Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Cliche, Comedy, F/M, Humor, Romance, Satire, Tropes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-14
Updated: 2019-04-30
Packaged: 2019-05-22 00:16:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14925747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WindMeister8/pseuds/WindMeister8
Summary: A romantic song plays in the background, the wind blows the girl's hair ever so perfectly as her eyes glimmer-No. That doesn't happen in real life.This light-hearted series is a collection of short stories that pokes fun at cliche romantic scenes and gives them the reality twist that's desperately needed. So read, laugh, and enjoy!





	1. Run To Me

**(AU Note: Read through without the sentences in brackets and then read again with the sentences in brackets.)**

 

_There are two things in this world that take my breath away:  
Running and… Levi._

One of them was right in front of me. 

I halted in my tracks, my breath caught in my throat. The short, raven-haired man stood in the large hall way, dressed in a simple hoodie and track pants. He still hadn’t caught sight of me as his gaze was held by something else. I backed away slowly, hoping he would not turn in this direction.

_(He had sworn that he would not go easy on me.)_

Lady Luck was not on my side.

His grey eyes met mine when my track shoes squeaked loudly against the marble floor. I froze, my lips turning dry as his intense stare burned into me. It was like looking into the face of the hot sun – my legs turned into jelly under his gaze. When his lips parted, I was finally jolted into action. 

Spinning around, I took off in the opposite direction away from him and tore down the long corridor. I knew I had the initial advantage but soon enough, his echoing footsteps told me he was closing in. My heart hammered loudly in my chest as I pumped my legs faster and harder.

_(I was running out of energy.)_

The end of the corridor in sight, the only exit was a long staircase that stretched far up into what seemed like oblivion. With tears building in my eyes, I scurried up as fast as I could, not daring to look back to see where he was.

_(Why the hell was this staircase so fucking long??)_

But seconds later, I heard his deep baritone voice call my name. I couldn’t help but stop, my legs unable to budge from its spot.

_(There was no way I could climb this damn staircase anymore.)_

Reluctantly, I turned to face him, my head bowed in guilt. He studied my flushed face for what seemed like eternity while I exhaled a shaky breath.

_(This was why I hated any form of exercising.)_

Finally, he spoke in his usual monotone. “Why did you run away from me?”

I winced at the question, choosing instead to shove my trembling fingers into my pockets.

He sighed audibly as a hand ran through his hair. “I told you I would catch you no matter where you go.”

“I’m sorry.” Mumbling my apology, I fidgeted uncomfortably. “It’s my fault… I shouldn’t have bailed on you like that.”

I dared a glance at him, hoping against hope that he would forgive me. His stern gaze softened as the corner of his lips curved upwards in a smirk.

“You know… you were running in the wrong direction just now,” he said.

Confused, I raised an eyebrow in question.

He added, “You should have run towards me.”

Levi pointed his thumb in the direction of the hallway. “After all, the lifts are that way.”

_(…The nerve of this fucking physical fitness trainer!!)_

_There are two things in this world that I hate…_  
Running and…. Levi. 


	2. Forced Coincidence

Like something out of a black and white romance film, the night scene was painted by dim street lighting and a secluded bridge with the main characters taking center stage. They stood facing each other on the pavement, the city lights from afar casting a warm silhouette on them. 

It was clear to any observant eye that they were in the midst of a lover’s fight, unwilling to put down their pride and reconcile their misunderstandings. Nothing could change their stance in the matter.

Except maybe…

“(F/N), do you copy?” The static crackle of the radio shattered the silence of the night. Shook out of her lazy slump, the woman dressed entirely in black grabbed her transponder.

She hissed in a low voice. “Levi, couldn’t you be more fucking discrete??”

Her gaze still fixed on the bickering couple ahead of her, she pulled her cap further down to obscure her face. 

“Is the target there or not, brat?” Levi’s bored voice drifted down the line as she lowered her foot on the pedal but not quite enough to build momentum.

“Yes, yes, yes,” she griped. “Can I take the shot now??”

Always eager to get the job done, the adrenaline levels in her body were already through the roof. She was ready to put an end to this couple as soon as she was given the go-ahead. 

“You’re cleared, (F/N). Do it fast. There’s another couple nearby that needs taking care of after that too. Fuck, this is a busy night.”

Groaning, she gripped the rubber handles of her deadly vehicle and shoved the transponder down into her slingbag. She was equally as frustrated as her partner but at least she got to see the action. Until Levi was removed from his suspension, he could only do desk jobs. Something that she constantly teased him about for the past few days. Maybe this time, she should leave a mark at the scene to rub it in his face…

A wily grin spread across her face and she pushed down hard on the pedal, quickly gaining momentum as her sleek bicycle sped towards the couple. At the last possible minute, she rang the small bicycle bell a few times in warning. As anticipated, the couple jumped away and into each other’s arms.

Once she cleared her targets, she glanced back. With her job done, the two lovebirds stared at each other with googly eyes, their fight all but forgotten. One more couple successfully reunited. It was honestly pretty disgusting to see them all cheesy, she thought. Best to leave her mark now!

“Sorry!” she shouted, making the couple jump at the intrusion into their love time.

They glared at her but she only pedaled away, leaving them in the dust. 

As their company slogan always said, the Cupid Bike efficiently brings couples together. So on to the next target!


	3. Love Bug

His sleeping face looked so tranquil like an angel from heaven. None of his usual grumpiness could be seen, replaced by a soft expression that made him look years younger.

You smiled gently, a hand reached out to sweep his bangs aside. Lightly running a thumb down his cheek, you giggled as he turned in his sleep to rest on his back, his arms thrown out haphazardly.

Catching him like this was unexpected and so worth it! You didn’t understand why he never wanted anyone to see him when he was sleeping but you would give anything to see him so vulnerable like this. 

Like a lusty vampire, you drank in the sight of his youthful face, his tempting neckline, and his oh-so-vulnerable position. Cheeks flushed at the dirty thoughts that sprang in your mind, you cleared your throat and looked away. 

But you couldn’t resist the magnetic pull of his subconscious charms and found yourself staring at him from the corner of your eyes. Almost as if on cue, he shifted and his arm suddenly reached upwards.

Your heart raced as hundreds of drama and fanfiction scenes replayed in your mind, the cute romantic music that came with it leaping into life. Could this be it?? The part where he pulls you down onto him and you share the most romantic ever smooch??

A smile creeping across your lips, time seemed to slow down to a crawl. His hand moved past your ear, almost grazing it and sending goosebumps down your arm. You watched as his long, thin fingers reach for your face and you shuddered in a mix of anticipation at his teasing touch.

Suddenly, his palm gave a mighty shove that sent you reeling backwards and landing on the bed in an ungraceful manner. You cried in pain, a hand flying up to rub your bruised nose.

What in the hell??

A grumble leaving his lips, he shifted again and swatted at the air. Still deep in sleep, he mumbled, “Stupid fly.”

That’s when you learnt that there were two kinds of sleepers who move during sleep: Those who seek for something and embrace it (the Love Bug)… and those who flail and inflict pain (the Jerker). 

Your life-long lesson:

L was a Jerker.


End file.
